Yesterday I read a heart breaking article written by a middle-aged man. It’s taken me this long to recover from it.

I’ll summarise his story.

When he (the storyteller) was young his powerful, rich, well-respected father walked out on his wife and children and left them to defend themselves.

Though it was never said – I think Daddy found a younger woman.

Daddy’s abandonment affected all in very deep ways.

The story teller grew up with huge issues concerning “personal” relationships. A pattern had been instilled, subconsciously, from the youngest age. AVOID LOVE.

Every single adult relationship he had followed exactly the same line. Quick attraction. Straight to bed. THIS is LOVE. Then came – ooops.

He didn’t actually like his lover, so he got rid of her ASAP by cheating on her with one/two/several other women.

Then he got married. It started exactly the same way. He did exactly the same thing. Only the woman he’d married was NOT going to take this. She set out on a long-term plan of revenge that lasted years.

First she left him for another man. Then she came back with a story about abuse and this and that. Please save me, husband. I’ve always loved ONLY you.

He took her back.

The same thing happened several times until one day, the story teller actually FELL IN LOVE.

He had a huge panic attack and re-lived everything that had been done to him and that he’d done to others.

Only THIS time he went into overdrive.

He became the nasty, malicious, manipulator. He couldn’t walk out because he’d never actually walked in. Change of tactics needed.

So – because the woman he loved didn’t know that he loved her. And because he couldn’t ABANDON her. He set out to destroy her. To make her HATE him.

This gave him THE PERFECT EXCUSE to leave.

How? Why?

Well. All he had to do was say- there was nothing there in the first place. SHE is the nasty, malicious manipulator. NOT ME.

I AM CLEAN AND INNOCENT.

What made me cry was the end of the article. When he’d finally woken up and seen himself for what he was :o(

Excuse Me but…everyone of us has childhood wounds. But not ALL of us blame another person for something that happened to them which few know about ?